These were the words of my 15 months old son Doven, on the 5th day of my dad's passing. I was very suprised, he called this name and pointed at my dad's photo on the night of the 5th day, and ever since he would look and touch at my dad's photo whenever he mutter these words.
It is really painful to know that dad had missed this by only 5 days. Doven don't even know how to say mom and dad. Even my daughter whenever she sees my dad when he is alive would tell my mom in protest if my mom did not ask her: 奶奶，你没有叫我叫爷爷。。。
I hope the only console is that his grandchildren are more filial then me, day in day out, for some reason there is a hallowness in my, i can't seem to feel any happiness, i have a good job, loving wife, sensible children, stable lifestyle, but recalling how dad has sufferred in his last days, I cannot help but feel empty. I never expected that his passing would have such a huge impact, I never knew how much deep in my heart I have loved him. I can tell that my sis love him more, looking at the things she has done for him and me? I have gave him nothing but caused his death.
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